sensual fusion

Informed. Empowered. Sensually Fused.

Sensual Fusion Blog

The blogs on Sensualfusion.com are written by some of the top sexuality experts around. Their information is based on scientific research and fact. Come learn about the latest news, "trends," and issues related to sex, sexual health, and intimate relationships...

Security = Better Sex

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Being secure has never meant so much to the quality of your relationship. According to researchers at the University of the Basque Country in Spain, people who feel secure in their romantic relationship have a more satisfactory sex life than those who are insecure with their partner. Being secure also means having a greater ability to be more attuned with the affection one doles out.  

Such findings are based on a sample of 211 long-term couples, ages 20 – 65, who answered questions regarding sexual satisfaction, sexual behavior and care, and their level of conflict in their erotic desire. Participants were divided into two big groups depending on their affective model – insecure versus secure - with the former group then categorized as having either an anxious or ambivalent attachment style.

As expected, insecure individuals faired far worse in their relationships than secure people in being less happy and experiencing more conflict in their sexual desire. People described as anxious-ambivalent were more compulsive in their care for their lovers, while those described as avoidant were more controlling and experienced more conflict in their sexual desire.

So what could this mean for your relationship? If you’re the anxious type, then it’s likelier that you’re clinging onto your partner, as well as compulsively caring for your sweetie. If you’re the avoidant type, then it’s more probable that you’re evading the relationship, never truly allowing yourself to own the union. Hence, you’re probably experiencing more intimacy problems. And if one of you is anxious and the other is avoidant, then you probably already know well that this disastrous combination is likeliest to end up on the ropes; such couples often end up needing to go to counseling.

In resolving such issues, researchers recommend that each person actively support the other emotionally, e.g., when one is feeling down. Lovers also need to recognize their own need for support and ask for such whenever they feel anxious. The ability to put yourself in what they call a ‘position of dependency’ allows for a better state of being, ultimately making for a healthier, more secure relationship. And that can make for a better sex life!

The Most Coveted, All-Consuming Orgasm Around

Thursday, July 08, 2010

It’s down to the last climactic moment. On Saturday, the Netherlands and Spain will play for the 2010 World Cup title, inspiring orgasmic reactions on and off the field alike. While the sex to be had by fans is admirable in celebrating their team’s victory (e.g., there’s a bumper year of births in England the better their team does, which, alas, won’t be so in 2011), football is the love fest. It’s the substitute for sex, capturing hearts, minds, and desires like nothing else worldwide.

Arousing and adrenaline-pumping, it’s the goal scoring in particular that invites an orgasmic experience that can never be had with a lover. The euphoric sensations and feelings players get from scoring a goal – from achieving that lifelong dream - are ones that can never be had in any other way, and shared no more passionately than with one’s teammates.

Best yet, peak performance is with the whole world watching, cheering you on, letting you ride - and ride – this most magnificent climax as your teammates smother you with hugs, kisses, and what, in many ways, looks like simulated sex. For a lot of people, footballers and fans alike, it’s all better than sex.  

The World Cup final match is like no other; it’s more important than any other. Unlike most people’s sex lives, the thrills witnessed here are forever captured in history books. They’re recounted throughout the ages. The fact that both Spain and the Netherlands have never held a World Cup title makes losing their virginity, I mean, celebrating either’s victory all the more “sexciting.”

So who do you predict giving you your kicks this weekend?


Recent Posts


Tags


Archive


    Blog Contributors

    Madeleine Castellanos, MD

    Read Bio


    Yvonne K. Fulbright, PhD

    Read Bio


    Talli Yehuda Rosenbaum
    Read Bio



    Amy Levine
    Read Bio



    Konstance McCaffree, PhD
    Read Bio


    Ron Feintech
    Read Bio


    Shere Hite
    Read Bio